[00:00.00] 作词 : Bo Burnham [00:00.00] 作曲 : Bo Burnham [00:00.00]作词 : Bo Burnham [00:00.27]作曲 : Bo Burnham [00:00.54]Welcome to the Internet! Have a look around [00:03.99]Anything that brain of yours can think of can be found [00:07.38]We've got mountains of content — some better, some worse [00:11.43]If none of it's of interest to you, you'd be the first [00:15.39]Welcome to the Internet! Come and take a seat [00:18.90]Would you like to see the news or any famous women's feet? [00:22.89]There's no need to panic; this isn't a test, haha [00:27.24]Just nod or shake your head, and we'll do the rest [00:30.81]Welcome to thе Internet! What would you prefеr? [00:34.26]Would you like to fight for civil rights or tweet a racial slur? [00:38.25]Be happy! Be horny! Be bursting with rage! [00:42.57]We've got a million different ways to engage [00:46.14]Welcome to the Internet! Put your cares aside [00:49.62]Here's a tip for straining pasta; here's a nine-year-old who died [00:53.34]We've got movies and doctors and fantasy sports [00:57.15]And a bunch of colored-pencil drawings of all the different characters in Harry Potter ****ing each other [01:01.17]Welcome to the Internet! Hold on to your socks [01:03.81]'Cause a random guy just kindly sent you photos of his cock [01:07.08]They are grainy and off-putting; he just sent you more [01:10.77]Don't act surprised—you know you like it, you whore [01:13.38]See a man beheaded, get offended, see a shrink [01:16.08]Show us pictures of your children, tell us every thought you think [01:18.93]Start a rumor, buy a broom, or send a death threat to a boomer [01:21.96]Or DM a girl and groom her; do a Zoom or find a tumor in your— [01:25.23]Here's a healthy breakfast option, you should kill your mom [01:27.75]Here's why women never **** you, here's how you can build a bomb [01:30.81]Which Power Ranger are you? Take this quirky quiz [01:33.78]Obama sent the immigrants to vaccinate your kids [01:37.86]Could I interest you in everything all of the time? [01:41.04]A little bit of everything all of the time [01:44.13]Apathy's a tragedy, and boredom is a crime [01:47.07]Anything and everything all of the time [01:49.53]Could I interest you in everything all of the time? [01:52.71]A little bit of everything all of the time [01:55.77]Apathy's a tragedy, and boredom is a crime [01:58.71]Anything and everything all of the time [02:11.13]You know, it wasn't always like this [02:18.27]Not very long ago, just before your time [02:25.92]Right before the towers fell, circa '99 [02:32.79]This was catalogs, travel blogs, a chatroom or two [02:40.77]We set our sights and spent our nights waiting for you! [02:50.43]You, insatiable you [02:55.53]Mommy let you use her iPad; you were barely two [03:03.24]And it did all the things we designed it to do [03:11.07]Now, look at you! Oh, look at you! [03:16.92]You, you! Unstoppable, watchable [03:26.34]Your time is now, your inside's out, honey, how you grew [03:33.54]And if we stick together, who knows what we'll do? [03:41.13]It was always the plan to put the world in your hand [03:48.57](*Laughing hysterically*) [04:00.60]Could I interest you in everything all of the time? [04:06.72]A bit of everything all of the time [04:11.49]Apathy's a tragedy, and boredom is a crime [04:16.53]Anything and everything all of the time [04:20.07]Could I interest you in everything all of the time? [04:23.16]A little bit of everything all of the time [04:26.22]Apathy's a tragedy, and boredom is a crime [04:29.01]Anything and everything and anything and everything [04:31.62]And anyt