The Ballad Of The Half Brained Man

歌手: Chamber • 专辑:L'Orchestre de Chamber Noir • 发布时间:2002-10-13
作词 : Chamber
 作曲 : Chamber
Born on a wednesday noon,
 somewhere in the midlands,
 they´d mistaken half his brain for the afterbirth and threw it away.
 Since that day he always needed someone to look after him.
 his half-hearted mother gave him away
 so his halfbrother took care
 brought him down again
 since he was only running upstairs
 took off the clothes he´d forgotten to take off,
 whiped his back when he´d **** in his pants
 cause he´d forgotten to take them down while sittin on the pot.
 Another reason for why he never had friends:
 He was unbearably forgetful, dumb and smelled.
 On the day his halfbrother died he had to start to grow
 and look after himself,
 he got a part time job in a library
 and yeah, you know the story, he never finished a book,
 eventhough he´d started them all.
 One day, in the pub, after work, having half a pint
 he realized for the first time
 that there was something missing in his life
 for the first time he was aware of his lonelyness
 what caused a flood of half pints
 till he got thrown out and stumbled towards home.
 From the next day on he was looking for his woman
 but of course, none of those he had chosen was in any kind attached to him.
 He got very frustrated and depressive,
 drunk ways too much and still smelled;
 remember this little restroom - problem!
 This also didn´t help the situation.
 He was so sick and tired of his half-a-live
 that he´d decided to commit suicide
 and shot himself in the head.
 Nothing happened of course
 it was the wrong side of the skull - the one with no brain.
 He was taken to the hospital where he,
 packed in bandage stumbled into a person on the corridor
 packed in bandage, too.
 But oh-god, it was a female with her skull dressing on the opposite side than his...
 Half a year later they were married
 and when their child was born - oh what a miracle:
 it was fully brained.
 He was the most happy person on this planet eventhough he was still
 unbearably forgetful, dumb and smelled...
 So, their life became more and more difficult,
 she slept when he was awake,
 she shut doors when he wanted them open...
 their love turned into hate
 and one day she took the child and left him.
 It looks like femals can deal better
 with half brained lives than males.
 She went back to her mother
 where she still lives her happy half-brained life.
 But he drowned in deep depressions again,
 became worse than ever before and,
 yes, one day he took the old gun again and...BANG...
 this time he got the right side.
 He´d learned something after all.
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